I hate skype

I hate skype. not that any other online messenger would have proved help in that scenario. that was an ill fated time and it happened to me. will not keep you guessing for long as to what happened that fateful day and how was skype responsible for it.

here’s what happened.

boss was out of station for 4 out of the 5 working days in the last week. then he was coming on friday and everyone was bent on his/her computer to show that they are working. lemme confess, i learnt that i am able to work more and better in a less noisy environment.

so, do i work in a noisy environment? my colleagues will kill me for writing this. yes. the office i am working at only fears the boss. as soon as the boss is out, work comes to a standstill. the vellas come out of their confines and the noise and clutter and bollywood songs begin.

on friday, boss returned to office and the vellas once again went to the confines of their cubicles and all noise subsided. then the only means of communication is the skype.

although skype is for official internal communication, it is seldom used thus. it is used to pass jokes, puns, and sometimes horny things one comes across on the internet.

boss had come out of his cabin to use the washroom and i felt a sour smell following him. trying to show my smartness, i decided to share this information with a colleague on skype.

but the skype reached the boss.

how? because i was fated.

this will be too technical to explain and i will not want to explain it here. boss had recently sent me a skype and when i clicked on skype, it was his skype window that opened accidentally. unaware of this and not waiting for a second, i sent him this message – lagta hai boss ne gandi wali itr lagayi hai (looks like boss has applied a bad and cheap perfume).

i realised this after the message was sent and i was awe struck. now what…

i rose and announced to other colleagues that i had made a blunder.

watching my face and open mouth, everyone knew there was something serious.

what, they asked.

me: i have sent a skype to boss which was not intended for him.

colleagues: so who was it intended for.

i pointed to the colleague. everyone knew what this colleague and me shared on skype.

me: no didn’t send anything of that sort.

colleagues: so what’s the fear?

me: it was about boss only.

colleague: don’t tell me. what was it?

and everyone came up to check on my laptop.

then the rush of ideas followed.

until he has come back to his room, go and delete that skype.

no that will be dangerous. what if he returns and finds me doing that. that will also delete all his past skype history.

boss returned to his room after a good fifteen minutes. i thought it will be better to tell him the truth. but half truth.

it was right there on his laptop. my stopping him from reading the skype message made him more curious.

he read it but didn’t react in the manner i had thought. no flaring up and rebuking me for misusing the company’s facilities.

instead, he scolded me mildly for indulging in such womanly activities.

i must have known this. he is such a confident person that incidents as these cannot create inferiority complex in him. sometimes i feel like being like boss – so adept at handling the different situations in life.

i couldn’t convince him that it wasn’t meant for him.

but i knew i will not be spared with so less. boss has his own way of traumatising people.

when i came out, everyone was waiting with folded hands about what happed behind closed doors. they relieved a sigh of relief when i told about his reaction.

since then, people couldn’t stop from laughing.

as for me, i didn’t know how to face boss. then there was the fear of boss’s next step.

he called me half an hour before we were to leave for home. it was a meeting of four of us. i came late and he asked me to sit in the middle. i knew the ragging session had begun. then he played the song aditi from jane tu ya jane na and asked me to dance. i said i don’t know to dance and everyone laughed. i had got the indication – any other attempt at belittling the boss can be dangerous.

the turbulence has passed. know that boss will not remember this for long. but as someone told, impression is like a glass. once it breaks, the scars remain forever. thought it would have been so good had there been a time machine and i could have altered just this incident from life. sorry, i didn’t have the luxury.